Dances and Weddings in Sri Lanka

January 15-16

Free Day

Dances and Weddings in Sri Lanka

Wandering free "out of the bubble" around Kandy

John showing map on I-pad to tuck-tuck driver

Today we have a “free day” where we hope to explore "out of the tourist bubble" without a planned itinerary. We begin our day by walking into town to have our coffee fix and meet Marie and Steve at the Natural Coffee restaurant.  Steve is still managing to drink only tea on this holiday.  John stops by a store to get a Sim card so he can download maps ~ the vendor carefully cuts down a large sim card to make it Nano-size to fit John’s I-pad!  He tells him to wait 10 minutes before trying to access the card and enter the password. Later when John does this he discovers he must use a phone to dial 222 but since the iPad does not have a phone, this doesn’t work.  Oh well worth a try and interesting to see how they craft the sim card.  John heads for the National Buddhist Museum, which Marie had enjoyed earlier.

Marie with her ever ready I-phone 

Marie, Steve and I go wandering shops, streets and a Hindu temple.

Priest in Hindu Temple 

Marie is thrilled to find an Ayurvedic store where she buys sandalwood cream to reduce her wrinkles as well as another product for diabetics.  We are told the prices here are not the tourist prices and indeed I notice they are much cheaper than at the tourist Oak-Ray Isiwara Ayurvedic village we had visited the day before. However, no claims of money back guarantees are made here. 

Kandy, a population of 112,000 people, used to be the capital of the last Sinhalese Kingdom.  It has a lake as its centerpiece surrounded by misty hills.  Apparently this lake used to be a rice field and now greatly contributes to the beauty of this place.  The town is crowded with hundreds of tuck-tucks that they call “three-wheelers” that line up like bicycles squeezing between trucks and vans. I wonder about introducing three-wheelers to Vashon, but Steve tells me they are not good for the environment.   

Buffet Lunch 

We have lunch at the same Hindu restaurant we enjoyed the day before, already becoming creatures of habit. 

Afterwards John and I go to the grocery store and stock up on essential supplies. Aside from missing good coffee, due to our monkey burglary I have been withdrawing from my two other addictions ~ cookies and chocolate. The evening has been planned with traditional Sri Lanka dancing where we see three types of dances.

Kandyan Dance.

These dancers and drummers lead the centuries old procession (perahara in July) and celebration to honor the Sacred Tooth. The handsome and sexy male dancers’ bare chests are covered with breast plates of silver and ivory, and their arms and legs with silver bangles. They energetically leap and do multiple back flips accompanied by complex drumming beats.

Devil Dance

Two men with grotesque devil masks come on stage to do devil dancing, performed in order to free a person from evil spirits or bad luck. (I needed this two days earlier) We all enjoy these dancers and in particular the male dancers who are incredibly acrobatic doing up to 7 back flips across the stage and looking like they enjoy themselves. I wonder if these dances are authentic or if they are just done to entertain tourists.

Watching the women dancers I notice most of them seem dour and angry.  It makes me wonder about the role of women in this culture.  

Although Sri Lanka was the first country in the world to have a female prime minister this was primarily a continuation of a dynasty rather than an indication of gender equality.  Apparently only 5% of parliamentary members are women and this number has not changed since 1930.  So far I have noticed in places such as the Ayurvedic store, restaurants and at the market that men do most of the talking while women are quiet and smiling.  Moreover when we are with guides they are more likely to provide John and Steve with information than Marie or myself. We have had no female guides. 

For our dinner this night at the Muslim Hotel (which is really only a restaurant), I have kotu .. a mashed-up hash like mixture of chicken including bones, nan bread and cheese. It is outstanding except I have to work hard not to swallow bones… maybe I am supposed to eat those? 

January 16

Weddings in Sri Lanka

Finding good coffee 

Leaving Kandy, John asks Karu if we can stop somewhere for a decent coffee.  Just outside of Kandy, Karu pulls into a hotel and to quote John “to have the most interesting cup of coffee in our life time.” 




Here to our surprise we see 4-5 different wedding ceremonies. 

First Day of Wedding in White 

Some of the grooms are dressed Western style in suits and others are dressed more elaborately.

Groom

Groom's Shoes 

Groom's Best Men

When the beautifully and ornately dressed bride arrives at this hotel dressed in white and pearls she is welcomed by traditional Kandyan dancers in their elaborate outfits. We learn that this dancing observed the night before is indeed traditional and still used for such ceremonies. 

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The celebration starts the first day with the wedding  ceremony and bride dressed in white. On the 2^nd day the bride comes out dressed in a colorful sari and we are told she is to show a sheet, stained with blood to indicate she was a virgin when married.  At this wedding hotel we watch brides both arriving for the wedding and leaving the next day.  We see parts of six wedding ceremonies. 

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The music, dancing and dress of all the wedding guests are spectacular. 

I wonder if all of these weddings have been traditionally arranged by the parents and how long the bride and groom will have known each other before marrying. Karu tells us sometimes they have only met once or twice before marrying.  In his own case, he had a “love marriage” as he met his wife in Dubai and married her despite his parents’ unwillingness to support the marriage.  Apparently the bride and groom are expected to be of the same socioeconomic status, ethnicity and caste status. Additionally, there is a preference among Tamil and Sinhala groups for cross-cousin marriage (child of one’s father’s sister or brother).  Google informs me that the age at which people marry is on the rise and that divorce is more common but still occurs in less than 1% of marriages. We reluctantly leave these wedding events and I am surprised how we have been welcomed to take pictures of such an intimate event.  John suggests we should get remarried here.  I think I would never look as beautiful as these Sri Lanka brides.